I brawl, through space and time
Of my amorphous mind,
Against my own demons;
My formidable alter egos.
I took not absolute dominion,
Over the realm of my mind.
Apparently I’m shrouded,
By an uncanny aura;
I laud as fear.
Alas, this particular vibe,
Stirs unspeakable fright in me.
And then my psychic conflict
Finally comes to a halt.
There’s a ray of hope
In the abyss of my mind,
Which has begun to diminish
Until it is pitch black.
My hopes get maimed,
Whenever I seek redemption.
There lurks a fickle force,
Yanking me into the field of neutrality.
Amid its to-ings and fro-ings
Between virtue and vice,
I become oblivious of my decision
And lose track of irreversible time.
With the attraction and repulsion,
It stops and drowns me
Into an ocean of limbo,
Where I realize I’m a befitting goon
Whose life is in nothing but shambles.
The form of peace that can reform
My damaged-beyond-repair faith,
Should be an endless cycle of anguish.
Death is certainly a reprieve
To my needless existence.
I want the cold phalanges of death,
To shove his blood-tinted hands,
Into my roomy heart and crush it,
Without a tinge of mercy towards me.
That’s justice for my iniquity.
This unending battle,
Occurring in the void of my psyche,
Further torments my conscience,
In ways even I can’t fathom.
My despair has become a curse;
And I, an abominable disgrace.
Nature compels sleep to desert me.
I’ve lost its touch for several nights.
I still wonder why I’m yet to sight
The shadowy figure of death.
I recall death granting me
Unnecessary second chances,
So that I can atone for the well of evils
I’ve solely dug for my barren life.